I have had a truly horrible week and have been so affected by events that, just this once, I can’t even talk about it. Coming on top of the months of work and emotions involved in the-house-move-that-never-was, and my continuing menopause transition, I have really struggled to cope and am now utterly physically, mentally and emotionally drained and very MEish. I haven’t been so much kicked while I was down as robbed and beaten 😢.
And then last night something altogether fucking weird happened. I haven’t been sleeping well and was finally in a much needed deep slumber when something woke me. I fumbled for the light and tried to bring the clock into focus – 1am. What on earth?! There was a very loud sound coming from somewhere in the bedroom. It’s hard to describe but the nearest I can get is it was a bit like the whir you get from a cookerhood extractor fan.
It seemed to be coming from the corner of the room where Bertie sleeps in his bed. He has a heat pad on as it’s winter, so my immediate thought was that must have become faulty. So I go over and pull out the plug…………but the noise continued.
Next to Bert’s bed is a radiator, so my next thought is there must be a leak and the noise is water escaping under pressure. I check both up-pipes but all is well. I lay on the floor with my ear to the floorboards, but although the noise is really loud I can’t seem to pinpoint anything. The thought of having to take up floorboards in the middle of the night is about as appealing as a bikini wax.
My bedroom is above the kitchen, so I go downstairs to check if something is amiss in there. Total quiet. Curiouser and curiouser.
I go back upstairs and the sound is definitely coming from Bertie’s corner of the bedroom. The only other thing over there is my large dressing table. I touch it and it’s vibrating 😲. So I open each drawer in turn and finally in the bottom drawer I find the culprit of the noise and it is this:
It’s a little gadget to remove fluff from clothes, which I haven’t used in probably 15 years. Somehow it had turned itself on in the middle of the night, despite the fact the button is quite stiff and fairly hard to push and the battery hasn’t been charged in well over a decade. What-the-ACTUAL-fuck?!!
I’ve said before that this house is haunted by a poltergeist and this just seals the deal. Which freaks me out more than a little bit if I’m absolutely honest.
I said to my bestie the other day that things happen to me that absolutely do not happen to other people and she couldn’t help but agree. For example, I was the only pupil in a 2,000 pupil school to contract Scarlet Fever, and the only person on my trip to Kenya who contracted meningitis. If there is bad luck about it loves to settle on me and I have no idea what I’ve done to deserve any of it. My entire life seems to have been challenging and I am perilously close to simply rolling over and admitting defeat.
The only nice thing on an otherwise dark horizon this week was being invited out for coffee by a lovely couple from my former camera club. But even that went belly up. We were chatting away when the wife rolled her eyes and said “don’t look now but x has just arrived!”. X turned out to be one of the women who bullied me out of the club and who lives 10 miles away in another town. The odds that she would be in the cafe I was in at 10.30am on a Saturday morning I would guestimate at a million to 1 – again with the what-the-ACTUAL-fuck?!
Surely, after 50 years of shite, I’m due some good luck and something not only nice but truly wonderful to happen. Hurry it along Universe because there’s only so much crap one person can take.