I won’t lie, this week has been physically tough. For two days I literally couldn’t stand upright for the pain in my abdomen, which turned out to mostly be down to the fact I was ovulating (early). Due to my endometriosis, ovulation has become almost as painful as menstruation so now instead of being tortured once a month, I’m tortured twice. Yay.
The huge surge in hormones associated with ovulation and menstruation play havoc with both my MCAD and my EDS. I already have a hiatus hernia which becomes even more slack at these times, allowing acid from my stomach back up into my esophagus totally unchecked. Histamine and other mast cell mediators respond to the rise in hormones, particularly in my stomach, increasing acid production which, added to the slack sphincter, causes reflux hell.
Add to this a lack of sleep and the emotional impact of huge surges in hormones and it leads to weepiness, grumpiness, anger and generally feeling shite. I swear if there is re-incarnation I am refusing to ever come back to this plane as a girl.
I had another good session with my counsellor on Tuesday. She is helping me understand why my Mum is using alcohol to push me away and knowing the reasons behind that does help me be less angry at her (some of the time!). In fact, the last few sessions have been so enlightening and helpful I’m not sure I need to keep going for therapy – I’ll make a decision about that next week.
Wednesday night was a competition night and I played a blinder. We are allowed to enter 3 photos per competition and mine got 3rd, 2nd and 1st place! It doesn’t get much better than that. I’ve also been working on another weird image I’m calling ‘At One With Nature’ which I’ve entered into the next competition. It’s sooo much fun dressing up, although I did get some very strange looks off the Postman when I answered the door to him looking like Morticia Addams 😉 The £8 wig off Ebay also shed like a mangy dog and I’m still finding 2 foot long hairs all over the house:
My dog walker’s daughter was poorly for 2 days this week which meant she couldn’t walk Bertie. Why do these things happen when a) my scooter was away being fixed and b) I was having such a horrendous week I could barely stand??! I just had to grit my teeth and walk the furry child myself, which was no fun in the world. My scooter came back on Thursday and is so far OK, but it’s been OK before only to conk out again – time will tell if it’s actually fixed or not.
Today I’m driving the 45 minutes through to my best mate’s house to spend the afternoon with her. It’s tiring and makes for a long day especially when I’m feeling rubbish, but at the same time it’s really nice to get away from the house which I rarely do. I have to take Bertie out first though, then drop him off at my parents’ house for the day, so I’d better get my lazy arse out of bed and get cracking!